When lost in despair what do you do?
Do you turn away and ignore the situation?
Find a sanctuary in your own mind?
Maybe you would rather face despair,
And show it the rage you have hidden inside?
Or would you do it all at once?
————Alexia Barrett, 2017 (Author)—————
Chapter 4 – What is going on?
Letting my anger face them instead of my fear, I stood straighter. I felt myself losing my mind second by second.
I felt the grin on my face, my head was hazy. Filled with a light heaviness, a weight suppressing my emotions like they were under the seduction of a drug. A veiled cloth upon me.
Nothing made sense.
Why is that? I didn’t feel whole. Immersed in a twilight pressure you only feel when ensnared in a light dream. Maybe a forgotten fantasy of the past, which you sometimes recall while bored and looking to the distance. I had submerged my mind in the dark, losing control of my body, making a majestic dance in the forbidden light black of my inner thoughts.
What bewitching darkness it was, haunting me, distressing my soul. Making my thoughts incoherent, while shaking like an old film, static and grainy- a screen without a signal. Staring through my own eyes but looking through a fogged mirror.
It wasn’t only my sight; all my senses betrayed me. I felt like I was underneath the sea’s waves, knocking against the ocean bed. I am outside of reality controlled by sense and perception.
I went deaf.
I can hear the soldier’s thoughts, I can touch their minds. In this state they are filling my emptiness with radiant life for brief moments. I want them, I want to touch what can never be mine, but as my hands drew near they drew further. Teasing me with their slight delights to snigger in my face like back-stabbing pixies.
And only then did my mind calm. I knew what to do… what I was going to do.
A strange confidence came over me.
A soldier in a mask, placed his hands on my shoulder, yelling back to his comrades, ‘It’s just some kid’. In his mind he was thinking of his precious wife and son he had left at home. He smiled and asked,“How did you get in here? This a restricted facility you know, we can’t have people wondering in here”
One of his comrades raised their gun however and yelled, ‘Jean, get the fuck away from that Kid!’
The man jumped back startled, and then saluted ‘Sergeant! Why it’s just a teenage boy?’
‘Just a teenage boy!’ The Sergeant laughed ‘Have you never seen an abnormality before. Some of them can disguise themselves as humans. Now move away!’
The man backed up and now they were all raising their guns at me.
Yet as they raised them the metallic smell of blood filled the air.
The man called Sergeant was on the ground, blood erupting from his mouth.
As his body fell everyone’s began firing at me, but funny enough their bullets didn’t come near me.
I revelled in their panic.
I killed the soldiers surrounding me one by one with a swish of my palm.
“What a Monster.” I heard in the depths of my mind. It was a memory. A wisp in the wind, a catching phrase, a trickle in a stream. Yet abruptly it woke me up
I became aware of my actions.
Why was this happening? Was I the one really doing this?
When I came back to my senses I was back again, in that bright corridor which now isn’t that bright, as it was now dark red where the walls had been touched with death.
It was a scene from hell where I stood above like a tyrannical overlord.
I had hurt people
I had become a monster.
They had cornered me like a rat, stripping me of hope. And I had broken free, defended myself in fear. I didn’t want this, I never wanted this, and all I ever desired was to leave. They forced me!!!!
No, no one forced me. I did what was my own instinct. What is going on!!!!?
“Aaaaargh!” screams interrupted my thoughts.
Screams, screams, screams always the same; save me, save me, the thoughts yelled. Looks of horror, tears of grief, blood. Blood from the people who had cornered me, the soldiers who had felt my wrath. There was so much blood, so much horror. Had I done this?
The eyes of the ones still alive were accusing me, I had made them suffer. Forever tinting their souls with hatred for me. Some of them sat there shivering, eyes hollow with a head of jumbled images, a mind driven to insanity.
What had I done? I never wanted this, I wanted, I wanted…to leave
But I didn’t leave I killed them…because, because I could. How evil and wrong was that?
My mind beheld thoughts that only the devil would welcome. My heart ripped when I felt the judgement they had against me. My surreal powers allowed me to hear their accusations and the fear in their thoughts.
It didn’t stop.
I began to cry at the agony of their loathing. I could hear their minds, every thought, every feeling and it was slowly overwhelming me. My body began quivering.
They saw my vulnerability and their desperation, their intent to hurt me grew stronger.
“Please stop” I begged as I ran into a corner, against a blood stained wall. It felt like they were looming over me, their mass of feelings/ thoughts drowning me. My head felt excruciating pain which made me scream until my throat went raw. I grabbed my head, knocking it against the wall. I tried to concentrate however it was hard, only when I could focus on one point was I able to ignore the other insistent thoughts.
Then more soldiers came and a familiar figure appeared. No not one, no two, I was wrong, it was three people. Three leaders, the three people I had first met while lying on that icy embankment; the boy, the scary girl, and the Asian woman.
The Asian woman put her cold gun right next my head and hissed, ‘Abnormal, Your tricks won’t work on me, so I think you should stand down.’
Her gun was glowing with a blue hue, instantly I was frozen, I couldn’t move my limbs.
Although the woman said that, I could feel that she was still scared of me. They were all scared, especially the girl named Liz. The very one that had sent fearful tingles down my spine when I’d first seen her. She was terrified of what I would do to them. Terrified of what I would do to her. She questioned why I was here, and strangely she was pleased I had come. What an inappropriate emotion to have.
Then the Asian Woman pushed me down, my knees buckled underneath me. I wanted to laugh because this was so ridiculous.
“I surrender” I proclaimed
I saw their faces riddled with disgust.
Soon I was handcuffed with cuffs made of the same strange material as the blue gun that woman wielded, I was then gagged and knocked out.
Seriously… what was going on?
Here’s chapter 4, Wow it took me a lot longer to edit and proof read that then I thought. The 14 year old me wrote a good story but seriously needed some help with grammar and spelling geez.
Anyway, Tell me what you think.
I’ll update more chapters tomorrow.